3 Reasons You Might Be Grieving the End of Ted Lasso

Contains show spoilers, and makes reference to bullying, racism and homophobia.

If you’ve been following the journey of the lovable coach Ted Lasso and his assistant Coach Beard, you may well have noticed a tinge of sadness that the show is finishing at the end of Season Three.

If you haven’t come across it yet, the comedy follows a three year journey of an American coach and his best friend, as they join a fictitious English football club, AFC Richmond, in an effort to pull them out of the Championship League. (Without saying too much, this storyline in itself has something of a twist.)

While it’s fair to say some are not bothered the show is ending, for others there is recognition of the loss that could be aligned with a sense of grief. Having worked in the field of bereavement for over 20 years, I’m here to say this is normal.

I explain in Answers In The Dark that loss looks like many things; if the pandemic taught us anything it’s that grief doesn’t just belong to death. Endings can be uncomfortable, even painful, and at the very least might leave us feeling like something’s missing.

We can experience these unexpected feelings when anything that matters to us is no longer there. This is why we might grieve if made redundant, when we retire or if a relationship breaks down – even when a celebrity dies, who we may have never met.

If society doesn’t recognise those losses – or won’t give us permission to grieve for them – it’s called Disenfranchised Grief. In the West, we seem to have created and endorsed a false framework of what we can grieve for – and for how long – and so after a while we feel like we should be “over it”. This isn’t an actual thing though, because grief doesn’t have an expiry date. But as a result our grief goes underground. We stop talking about it, or anything that feels like it.

So if you’re feeling the loss of Ted Lasso, it’s natural because it marks an ending. Here’s three other reasons you might be feeling it.

1. The Diamond Dogs

Ted Lasso was more than a comedy; the content will have resonated with people in many different ways. The show raised awareness of important topics like bullying, homophobia and racism, and particularly what those in sport are up against.

It also helpfully normalised conversations around men’s mental health, with the creation of the legendary Diamond Dogs: men coming together to talk about how they feel and what they need.

Some attribute the increase in Men’s Mental Health Support groups to the Diamond Dogs; the cast famously visiting Joe and Jill Biden at The White House, where the President acknowledged the importance of these discussions.

During the show, Ted also begins to suffer with panic attacks which he was eventually able to manage by opening up to his colleagues, having therapy, using healthy self talk and mindful breathing.

If you care about someone, and you got a little love in your heart, there ain’t nothing you can’t get through together.

Ted Lasso

2. Attention to Detail

The season also brought with it opportunities to hear the phenomenal voice of Hannah Waddingham who played Rebecca Welton and (for example) her rendition of the Frozen classic, Let It Go.

There were also subtle references to the Wizard of Oz, picked up by fans with AFC’s slogan of “There’s no place like home”.

The attention to detail also made the club feel real with AFC Richmond and some of the main characters having their own Twitter account. People may have naturally felt a connection because of this, depending on what they were navigating during the season.

The realism even stretched to the extent that famous teams like Manchester City would tweet if they were “playing” Richmond in an episode. No wonder people are left hoping for season 4.

3. Leadership

There were some great philosophy delivered in monologues and one liners, that I feel sure will be used on enrichment and leadership programmes for years to come.

The way Ted navigated challenges during the seasons, including his own mental health, demonstrated that leaders aren’t – and don’t have to be – perfect. He was able to deliver feedback without criticism, and helped people and their contributions feel valued and appreciated in meaningful ways. His kindness – a trait that can seem so rare these days, society seems naturally cynical of it – meant the world to those he met.

His approach to people also rubbed off on others; we watched characters grow as compassionate and authentic humans through the seasons, led by the example Ted set, as all good leaders should.

Human beings are never gonna be perfect. The best we can do is to keep asking for help and accepting it when you can. And if you keep on doing that, you’ll always be moving towards better.

Leslie Higgins

Whatever some may think of the show, there was definitely something special about the way it captured a lot of people’s hearts. So it makes sense if you’re feeling the loss in some way or are missing the show already; if you’re sad about that for a while, it’s ok.

In the end, Ted Lasso was a story about authenticity, integrity and hope. Whether there’s a Season 4 or not, I’m grateful for the episodes – if not the lessons – we were offered, and will keep Ted’s philosophy in mind.

Believe.

Ted Lasso is currently airing on Apple Tv, hopefully it will appear on mainstream TV soon. If you’re affected by any of the topics covered in this article these links may help.

Delphi is the author of Answers In The Dark: Grief, Sleep and How Dreams Can Help You Heal, out now on Amazon and Hive.

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